People who have been abused usually have a lot of problems through their lives like mental illness, work/financial problems, relational problems and addiction. Its plain harder for us to function in society than the person who was never abused. That means we are different on many levels. Being different in society has historically has not faired well for the minority. Abused people generally have more vulnerabilities than average people making them more of a target for bullying and various forms of controlling mental abuse, further marginalizing them. Why do we have this dynamic? This is a tough question to ask. Its like asking why does bullying exist or terrorism exist in the world. Why have people been treated by other people so historically bad? Is it a sociological question? A spiritual one? Some warped form of a survival instinct maybe? Are people just evil? It makes no sense to one who has a relatively good heart and conscious. I believe it stems from a psychological need for us to have power and control over others. Thats where it starts. Abuse starts in the mind, effects the mind and grows and stems out into the world creating monsters. It makes it hard to say society is good when abuse is historically systemized for the strong in control to benefit in one way or another. Is it in our nature to abuse each other then? Yes. It's also in our nature to love one another and lift people up and support them. Abuse is a brutal and ignorant survival instinct. Loving and supporting one another is a more advanced way of living that requires more effort and is less immediate. One is the easy way. One is the hard way. One is fear based and one is love based. There is more control in fear and virtually no control in love but there is peace ultimately. Does this mean fear is stronger than love? This poses another complex question and answer. In my experience fear is stronger than love. Fear has dominated my world most my life. I was abused by my father most of my childhood physically, mentally and sexually. He wouldn't let me speak. And guess what, no one ever did anything about it. Even my mother sat and watched for years even denying what was right in front of her face. The streets were dangerous, criminals ran things and the good people stayed at home. I've been shot at, jumped and harassed many times. The system treated me poorly and I saw the privileged succeed more than we did. People never seemed to listen to me until I become angry, using fear myself. Fear seems to be running the world today as terrorism and bullying runs rampant. From my view point fear is winning. Love seems like a distant force never utilized, some kind of lost art. Love seems to have never ran anything in history and thats why the abused will always be marginalized until something changes. Choose to love rather than fear. Love yourself and love each other. Stand up for yourself and others in love and peace, friends. We have to stick together. Maybe one day we’ll see a change in this world and society.
